Some Photos & Fancies

Photographs; & questions you wouldn't think to ask yourself…

The weight of understanding


05-10-13 016a

From the time we were very young and throughout the rest of our lives we intuitively know when someone cares for us. At times that caring can be a burden that is hard to bear. We also know that if we made our displeasure known about the way that person shows their love and their caring, we could terribly hurt that person and possibly anger others. For the sake of all involved we try to accept that when we’re around that particular person we will make an exception and allow our space to be invaded, to listen to things about us we don’t believe and don’t want to believe, and to effectively become the person others believe, or want to believe, we are. Our good intentions and wish not to hurt someone are noble but, in the end, will not serve us well at all. We cannot be all things to all people and the weight of understanding others’ needs is heavy; it is a weight we need not and should not have to bear. It is important, most of all to us, that others see us and know us as we truly are, not as a reflection of themselves or a caricature of the role they believe we should be playing. If we begin to play along, we’re playing at being a person and not living our lives as ourselves. Wouldn’t like to remove the weight of being someone you’re not?


Author: EllenphanPhotos

I've been struck many times by the thoughts that run through my head when I'm outdoors and contemplating nothing in particular. The thoughts can be profound or silly, sad or joyful, relevant or not. But they're always there. And with just a bit of concentration they can lead to the most astonishing places and on the most convoluted trails. Exploring those vagaries and jigs and jogs is fun. I'm attempting to find more of these trails to see if they lead anywhere or nowhere, because even nowhere is somewhere. The bits and pieces of the outdoors help to make the indoors survivable. Photos help bring the outdoors in and remind me of many of the thoughts I had while still outside, a very valuable tool they are, too.

6 thoughts on “The weight of understanding

  1. OMG Yes, for years and years I have hearing these phrases “Oh no, mom does not like that”- ” we don’t want to do …” and many other that include me, yes me, they have this thing that is to speak on my behave, but they don’t really express my truly opinion. They think that I think!!!! how is that possible? Lately I started to stop any conversation that include my opinion, said by others. I didn’t realize that they think of me as someone different of what I really am.

  2. Read this just while the thought “Oops, forgot to call Mom” crossed my mind! Reminds me of the quote from Castaneda’s Don Juan that I often recall when not talking truthfully: “You did everything right except let your spirit shine.”

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