Some Photos & Fancies

Photographs; & questions you wouldn't think to ask yourself…

Butting heads

2 Comments

10-14-13 010a

Sometimes, no matter how good our intentions, we find ourselves butting heads with someone. Perhaps we always butt heads with the same person, perhaps we butt heads with anyone around us. And, in general, those we butt our heads against will butt back; this creates an atmosphere and aura around both that is uncomfortable and irritating to those in the vicinity of both the butt-er and butt-ee. If all parties are, as a rule, in the same place at the same time a more than undesirable situation ensues and supports strife and dissension in the workplace, home, athletic site, or any place people are thrown together over and over. Once such an atmosphere has been established it is very difficult to defeat it and move on to a comfortable environment. We do have a choice – we can make an effort to be aware of our effect upon others, to see how our behavior affects those around us. From there we can make the choice to avoid the person we normally butt heads with, we can make overtures to that person and agree upon a truce, we can appeal to that person’s better nature (they must have one), or we can be strictly “business as usual” with them. Though we may think that making peace should be a mutual responsibility, shouldn’t we make the first effort at striking a truce anyway?

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Author: EllenphanPhotos

I've been struck many times by the thoughts that run through my head when I'm outdoors and contemplating nothing in particular. The thoughts can be profound or silly, sad or joyful, relevant or not. But they're always there. And with just a bit of concentration they can lead to the most astonishing places and on the most convoluted trails. Exploring those vagaries and jigs and jogs is fun. I'm attempting to find more of these trails to see if they lead anywhere or nowhere, because even nowhere is somewhere. The bits and pieces of the outdoors help to make the indoors survivable. Photos help bring the outdoors in and remind me of many of the thoughts I had while still outside, a very valuable tool they are, too.

2 thoughts on “Butting heads

  1. Is exactly what happens here, me and my daughter have disagreements all the time, and it was going out of control. Since she came back from the university, everything changed. There were no possible solution but do what I do now, I’m aware of the situation so I took control in the only possible way for me, I’m a mother and a person too, so I decided for the silence, yes, I shut my mouth most of the time, being aware all the time that whatever I say could bring a rough situation. It is pretty common for me to invent any excuses to live the room when she is having a conversation with other, because she will turn to me, and tell me that I’m wrong and I know that will unleash tension between us and the rest of the family. May be is not the best solution but it seems to work for me. I want peace and good moments while she still home, soon she will be gone and I don’t want her to remember only awful moments at home.

    • Good for you for finding solution that is working for the moment – it wouldn’t be good for you to shut off your feeling & conversation forever; but keeping the peach in the moment is admirable.

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