Sometimes we feel left behind, that others are moving along ahead of us; that they now know more, are more oriented and having more fun. That they are satisfied and that we are not and don’t know how become satisfied. We may set ourselves apart even more by becoming distant or avoiding contact with those closest to us and thus confusing both. Speaking up about how we feel lost in everyone’s wake or disconnected from everything familiar because it is all changing can clarify the issues in our minds, but we have to be willing to accept that we cannot live in a static world because our world is not static; it is dynamic and we must at least watch and follow along or we will likely feel disconnected and left a step behind until we become dynamic ourselves. This is not to say that we are not left behind occasionally, sometimes being left behind is inevitable we all die; what we must remember about that is that we, in our turn, will be leaving others behind. Sometimes it is best in any kind of relationship to leave each other behind if beliefs and goals changed or rates or directions of growth have diverged. It could be that being left behind or leaving another behind would be the best thing that could happen now, don’t you think?
Once we get used to something, it’s familiar; once something is familiar it is no longer threatening by its strangeness or its oddity. If there is no way to avoid being around something or someplace different than we’re used to we become habituated to that new or different thing. Then, when we’ve become habituated, we assume that everyone will like, understand, or want what we’ve become familiar with and consider normal. We find it very hard to understand when our lifestyle or way of thinking is rejected by others. We very seldom stop to think that, of course, they are habituated to their own lifestyles and frequently we will reject theirs in turn. This can become a damaging cycle that leads to more and more and greater and greater misunderstandings until someone takes those misunderstandings and creates threats or worse from them. It would be so much easier for those of us who want to stay indoors when it’s cold to do so and not to deride or question those who would rather be outdoors. Preferences are not a matter of right or wrong, they are simply preferences and should not be taken as a personal statement to a specific person or group. If you like & prefer what is familiar to you, won’t you let others like & prefer what is familiar to them?
When once one has seen a bigger part of the world than one’s own tiny piece, it becomes clear that one is not really larger than life and that one is not really the most important thing in the wider world; and it may occur to one that an occasion or two may come where a bit of protection is in order. One thing to remember is that protection does not mean being taken care of; nor does it mean that you will be protected from everything and anything. Being protected is not about being completely shielded from physical and mental danger either; it is about allowing one to see the danger and to learn from the circumstances so that you will be able to deal with that kind of situation again on your own. Being protected is also about having a glimmer of hope, for a protector should also include a bit of the mentor in their make up. It is not a good thing at all to come to rely on your protector to take all responsibility for you and your actions; you must remember and hold in your mind that your choices are your own and ultimately you are responsible for yourself. But it is nice to look down and see a larger than life reflection mirroring what you would like to become, isn’t it?
Toys are a fine thing to have, or to have the use of, for relaxation, learning, letting off steam and many other things. We all like some toys better than others, but a new toy is fun to experiment with, an old, familiar toy is a comfort and a friend, and a desired, but not yet acquired toy can be an incentive and a challenge. What we must remember is that objects are toys, living beings are not, and should never be considered so. If you damage, physically or emotionally, a living being you, or they, may not be able to repair that damage. When you purposely damage a non-living object, you may not be able to repair it, but the only living thing you may have damaged would have been yourself. This is no good thing either, but is less damaging to more parties, and may prompt you into a greater sense of responsibility than you displayed previously. We must decide when something can be considered a toy and when something is very definitely not a toy. Then we can make the choice whether to play games with an appropriate toy or risk damaging something that is not a toy at all. Would you choose not to choose, or would you choose to think before acting?
Sometimes you just don’t feel like it. Nothing is right about you and nothing goes right for you. Turning your back on the whole world and the unreasonable demands of all those others seems the only logical course to take.
Unfortunately we can’t often do that. Not if we want to continue to live life as we know it and not if we want to continue to learn and explore and try to make what we consider to be progress. So regardless of what it takes we do put out the energy to get up and get going. What’s strange about that is that once we’ve made the colossal effort to actually start doing something we frequently forget how negative we were feeling about things only moments before. Just as pasting a smile on your face makes your voice sound more positive, engaging your brain in some activity can make your perceptions more positive. Once the progression has started you may even feel interested in what you’re doing, and if you don’t or you’re in the middle of some mundane chore, you may have kindled interest in what you’ll be doing next or later on. Once you know you’re not stuck in ‘now’ forever, ‘now’ can be gotten through much more easily, and pleasantly as well, if you become willing to look on the bright side.
No matter how dismal the beginning, middle, or end of a day may be, you should always be able to count on yourself to transform your outlook, shouldn’t you?