Some Photos & Fancies

Photographs; & questions you wouldn't think to ask yourself…


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What do YOU think?

01-25-14 152

There is nothing wrong with asking another person for their opinion about a course of action you may wish to take, but you should keep in mind that you are you, and the only one who can actually make the choice for you is you. It can be extremely tempting to ask for someone’s opinion, follow their advice, then feel free to blame them if things do not turn out as you would have liked them to. This action you’ve chosen to take does two things: it spuriously absolves you of any responsibility for consequences of the action, though this may backfire if positive consequences ensue, and/or it creates an enmity or distance between you and the person whose advice you sought. In any case, if you develop the habit of claiming no responsibility for any of your actions the effects of doing so will primarily be felt by you, not others, in a negative way. You will be deprived of the satisfaction you can receive by making good choices, you will be deprived of learning opportunities, you will be deprived of the respect of others, and more. Isn’t owning your choices more positive than rejecting them?

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The bugs are better on the other side

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Hopes and dreams are good things; it’s good to have something to work for and something to long for, however we should not pin our hopes and dreams on things we know we’ll never be able to grasp, or that we really don’t want to grasp in the firs place. Sometimes we all fall victim to the conscious or unconscious urgings of others to follow along or mimic their actions, to get to the bugs that taste better for them, but not necessarily for ourselves. And sometimes we become so familiar with, and  because of that familiarity blind to, what we have that it has lost lustre and excitement, it’s sense of the new and the novel. If we do travel, one way or another, to that greener grass we are likely to find that we’ve landed right back where we’ve come from. Because, for the most part, we know that no matter where we go, there we are and all our positives and negatives come with, or follow, us. Unless we’re making the choice to move elsewhere for reasons unconnected to our wants, it is best to step back and take stock of what we have, what we’ll have to leave, and what there to realistically expect from the ‘better’ side. Shouldn’t we seek local satisfaction for our needs before rushing off somewhere, anywhere else?


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Follow me

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At times we can be seduced into following a certain course or a certain person and we are not quite sure how it happened. We saw someone or something that instantaneously captured a part of us, possibly without its own knowledge, and it won’t let us go. Whether it feels good to be held in thrall, or we’re indifferent to pro’s or con’s around our capture, or we’re terrified and screaming for rescue, what we must remember is that we can make choices. We can look at our behavior or feelings and take the initiative to decide to continue with our seduction and see where it leads or to break away and pursue other avenues. Breaking away may be difficult, especially if you have been enticed to follow someone or something that is nebulous and  you cannot quite bring them or the circumstances into focus. Nevertheless, the choice is ours and we must remember that if we reach an undesirable conclusion to the journey we have convinced ourselves we were seduced into. We may have been seduced into a positive journey as well, and undoubtedly there were positive aspects and things to be learned about ourselves if it did not end well. Once we find ourselves yearning to follow, shouldn’t we wait a moment, and follow, if we will, with open eyes?


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Solo

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No matter how much we might like the limelight or how much we might like to hide ourselves from view, there are times when we all must sing, whether we are small or great, and we all must sing solo. When that urge or that need comes upon we can choose to show everything we’ve got to an audience of one to hundreds, or we can lay out our accomplishments alone, only for ourselves. Not all tasks, work, pleasures, or needs must be performed in company. There are many that we and our culture prefer to occur in private, but with many activities it is assumed that one not only will perform them in company, but that prefers to. When this is not the case it is difficult make one’s true wishes known, especially if one is talented in some particular way; the assumption is made that one must want to show that accomplishment off, even given clear evidence to the contrary. If you wish to keep some things private and enjoy giving them to yourself, then that is something that not only must be made clear, but one must follow up that wish with firm opposition to any kind of persuasion being leveled at one. Shouldn’t you be the one in charge of distributing your own gifts?


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At speed

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Simply going means that you’re going at one speed or another; you could be sauntering along at the pace of a leisurely walk, you could be sprinting to the rescue of someone dear to you, you could be traveling at a moderate rate that will get ordinary tasks done in good time on ordinary days. Going at speed usually means that you are proceeding somewhat or much faster than one normally would. Sometimes when going at speed you are running away from your life or the troubles or dangers in your life. It is best to continue on at speed when you are escaping from danger or menace, one should not stick around to be abused or face the chance of abuse. However, if you are speedily trying to escape your life and the mistakes and missteps you have made in it you should realize, for you’ll surely learn, that you are speedily running in place. You can never escape yourself; no matter what occurs you will always be with yourself and your best escape from troubles, doubts, and missteps is to face them head on, not to try to run; if nothing else your shadow and especially your reflection will follow you. When you feel the desire to run is when you must look into the mirror and assess the truth about your present and begin to make a plan for the future. Running doesn’t help anything, does it?


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The weight of understanding

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From the time we were very young and throughout the rest of our lives we intuitively know when someone cares for us. At times that caring can be a burden that is hard to bear. We also know that if we made our displeasure known about the way that person shows their love and their caring, we could terribly hurt that person and possibly anger others. For the sake of all involved we try to accept that when we’re around that particular person we will make an exception and allow our space to be invaded, to listen to things about us we don’t believe and don’t want to believe, and to effectively become the person others believe, or want to believe, we are. Our good intentions and wish not to hurt someone are noble but, in the end, will not serve us well at all. We cannot be all things to all people and the weight of understanding others’ needs is heavy; it is a weight we need not and should not have to bear. It is important, most of all to us, that others see us and know us as we truly are, not as a reflection of themselves or a caricature of the role they believe we should be playing. If we begin to play along, we’re playing at being a person and not living our lives as ourselves. Wouldn’t like to remove the weight of being someone you’re not?


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Swept

06-12 01a

Sweeping is not only about cleaning house, and a broom is not the only thing that can be swept with. To sweep is an all-encompassing term that includes everything from sweeping dirt away to sweeping clouds away or being swept away in a storm. The term has inundated many aspects of our language, is appropriate to it, and it is understood whenever it is used. We can be swept off our feet by a stronger foe, or by circumstances beyond our control, or by the winds of change. Amongst all this sweeping it seems that we should be able to have a bit more control over our lives and the situations so that we’re not swept away by everything. If we allow ourselves to be swept away easily we’ll find we haven’t got idea one of where we’ve ended up or why we’ve ended up there. We can’t always avoid being swept away by something but we should know how to try to stop that strong and repeated pressure. Having a strong sense of self and direction can help with the aim of following our own paths. Recognizing the beginning of a sweeping motion will help as well; for then we can react against the motion if we so desire. We do want to be swept away sometimes, especially if we recognize where we’re being swept and wholeheartedly want to go there. We want the sensations of a new love, or the feeling of success and fulfillment from a job well done, or the satisfaction of completing a task that has compelled and eaten up all our time. We wouldn’t want to be swept away by a mob, or caught up in a friend’s vicious wrangle, or be unable to stop playing when on a losing streak while gambling. A sense of balance and a sense of self is really all that is needed to find a path through the brooms reaching toward us every day, and to make our own decisions about being swept. Is holding your own broomstick more appealing than succumbing to others’?